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Tyson! Tyson! Tyson!
The Mad World Of Mad Mike, Part One
Posted Sep 15, 2010 by Shaun Edwards
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‘Lennox Lewis, I'm coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!’ – Er, right you are, Mike, ‘Fear is your best friend or your worst enemy. It's like fire. If you can control it, it can cook for you; it can heat your house. If you can't control it, it will burn everything around you and destroy you. If you can control your fear, it makes you more alert, like a deer coming across the lawn.’ Tyson – good with analogies, less so with metaphors. ‘Everybody's got plans...until they get hit.’ – Logic. Tyson loves it. ‘My biggest weakness is my sensitivity. I am too sensitive a person.’ – Hmmmmm. ‘[On his childhood] One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like an infantile retard.’ – In many ways, this explains a lot. ‘There are nine million people who see me in the ring and hate my guts. Most of them are white. That’s OK. Just spell my name right.’ – Trust us, Mike. NO ONE is going to spell your name wrong. ‘Most writers, in my opinion, are dysfunctional derelicts’ – Ooh, get you! ‘I liked the money, the girls liked the money I had and I liked the girls’ – Can’t argue with that. ‘Sometimes I go swimming with the tiger. But, personally, I’m a lion man. Lions are very obedient, like dogs.’ – It’s tempting to say ‘fight a lion and prove it’, but Tyson totally would. ‘When I fight someone, I want to break his will. I want to take his manhood. I want to rip out his heart and show it to him.’ – Professionalism: it’s important. ‘There’s nobody that I fear in my life but God.’ – Still getting the sense Tyson would happily give God a right hook... ‘My shots are so accurate and so precise...not to be egotistic...but when they land they are so precise...I can't help it who you are...you have to go down, because there is a law when Mike Tyson hits you.’ – The law of not getting into the ring with the nutter in the first place. 'I could have knocked him out in the third round but I wanted to do it slowly, so he would remember this night for a long time.' Tyson after slowly destroying Tyrell Biggs: charming stuff.
'Real freedom is having nothing. I was freer when I didn't have a cent' – And you weren't on TV, so we were all a bit less scared.
‘Without discipline, no matter how good you are, you are nothing! One day, and I might not be around, you're going to meet a tough guy who takes your best shot. He'll keep coming because he's tough. Don't get discouraged. That's when the discipline comes in.' – OK, nothing funny about this one. Good call, Mike.